TeenAngels take on Washington D.C.
At first glance you may think that this post is a little outdated. The Wired Kids Summit in Washington DC was held this year at the end of May. And at that event many Wired Moms were introduced for the first time to an amazing group of kids known as the Teen Angels. (Pictured here just a few of the teenangels that presented their research in Washington D.C. this year).
The thing about being a mom is that we want to know everything we can about the stuff that impacts our kids directly. So, when we have a 6 year old in the house we want to know about beginning reading, sports for young kids, school, and anymore these days video games and technology for the young child. As each year goes by we need to learn new things.
So, even though the Teen Angel program has been around for over 10 years there are those moms out there that are just finding out about it now. And there will be moms who will be just finding out about it next year for the first time and so on.
What is a Teen Angel?
This was one of the programs that our moms who attended the Wired Kids Summit were most excited about and at a recent Build-a-Bear connect conference this was the topic that generated the most interest from the Wired Moms presentation.
Teenangels are a group of thirteen to eighteen year old volunteers (tweenangels are younger and have been as young as eight years old) that have been specially trained in all aspects of online safety, privacy and security. After completion of the required training, the Teenangels run unique programs in schools to spread the word about responsible and safe surfing to other teens and younger kids, parents, and teachers.
They write columns for Web sites and become expert public speakers and researchers. They work with companies like Disney, Microsoft and AOL and are trained by law enforcement agencies.
If your school does not have a teen angel program it is easy to get one started. CLICK HERE for more information on becoming a teenangel or starting a new chapter in your area.
Pro Tip #8
DON’T FEED THE TROLLS
When you are online and you see something that just absolutely outrages you can do a couple of things about it. One of the things you can do is to write to us and let us know about. You can hit delete and step away from the garbage that somehow inadvertently made its way into your line of sight. You can print off the story or report and then shred it to have a truly symbolic cleansing of the matter.
But whatever you do – DO NOT FEED INTO IT.
Negative communications escalate online due to misunderstandings. It happens all the time. But there is also an element out there on the Internet that would post malicious information just for the sake of stirring things up. Don’t let them get to you. They are Trolls. Do not feed them with your attempt to clarify the issue. That does not solve the problem and actually just makes them stronger. Don’t feed the Trolls.
Caution: Be Careful What You “Like”
This is a true story. To protect the innocent, names have been changed. For the sake of this article, instead of using an actual name we are going to insert “My Mother” but of course this story could have happened to anyone.
A funny thing happened on facebook this week. It happened, as most things do, in an odd synchronicity of events.
Early on in the week I saw that “My Mother” had clicked LIKE on the facebook group Laying in bed with your lights on wishing you had those clap lights. OK, so it was a little weird seeing My Mother embracing facebook’s groups like my 13 year old daughter does but that is just the beginning of the odd course of events about to ensue.
The next fun thing was that I read an article by Amy-Mae Elliott on Mashable about 10 fun tips and tricks on facebook. One of the tips was how to post a link that looked like a normal profile link but in actuality was sort of a tricky link. Whenever someone on facebook clicked on the link it would take them back to their profile page. In the article, they recommended playing a trick on facebook friends by making a post that says Worst Profile EVER! Then, of course, whenever someone clicked on the link it would take them back to their profile page. Anyone. It is sort of a cool link. But I think that is a little cruel so I took the opposite approach and posted Check out my favorite facebook friend of all time and posted the link. Then I sent out a private group message to the family members in my facebook with the link and a message for them to check it out to see which one of them I love more.
Ok, so are you following me so far?
1. My Mother joins group
2. I post prank link
Pretty harmless so far.
The next day I receive an email from My Mother (we are calling this anonymous person – could have happened to anyone – My Mother) emailed me with this message:
Yes facebook had shortened the name of the group to fit on the page and My Mother must have forgotten that she had recently joined the group because she was focused more on sending us the kids a message that she wants a Clapper for her birthday.
I was cracking up when I realized what happened and I hope I was able to explain it clearly enough to My Mother but it was still pretty funny. It did make me think about all those groups we join.
A cautionary note: Be Careful of what groups you LIKE on facebook. You don’t want your public facebook profile looking like a porn site.
5 things parents should know before buying video games
If you have kids you probably know a little something about video games. But there are so many games and so many systems it can be overwhelming. Where to start? What games to buy?
At Wired Moms we don’t just like video games we LOVE video games. It is a great way for families to spend time together but there is also an additional benefit. When you are sitting side by side with your kid playing games together your kid will often begin to open up about their day or about their concerns and you can have some real conversations with them that you might not be able to have without the buffer of the video game.
No matter what system you have there are a couple of things you should do before getting started (and if you are already into it there is still time).
1. MAKE A LIST
We are big into making lists before going shopping for anything. Impulse buying can be a budget buster. Talk with your kids about the games they want to get and what it is about the game that is interesting. Find out their likes and dislikes. This way if they are too young for a particular game you may be able to research the games together and find one that is more age appropriate. There are more games than ever out there and more options for the younger gamer too.
PRO TIP: Video Games are a treat – not actually a necessity for basic life support like food, water and shelter. Kids should somehow earn each new game and continue to earn the priviledge of playing the games. If they earn the game by doing extra chores, setting a goal in school and achieving it, or working on a project in their community, then they will learn to appreciate the value these games play in their lives.
2. CHECK OUT THE ESRBs.
Know the video game rating system. Our recommendation is to stick as closely to the rating system as possible. The good thing is that all the games are rated so if your 6 year old is asking for HALO because all of his friends have the game you can point to the ESRB rating and let them know that you are not the bad guy but other people have decided that 6 is too young to be killing aliens.
Their website is great because you can look in advance at the games you are interested in by name or rating or content. If you only want to browse games that are rated E (for everyone) you can do that easily with your kid before making your video game wish list.
The ESRB also has an easy to use app that you can add to your facebook wall and all you have to do is to type in the name of the video game and it will take you right to the page that gives you all the information you will need to know in advance before buying a new game.
PRO TIP: Our kids are counting on you. Many kids in the Wired Moms circle have been patient and have waited to earn the right and the priviledge to kill zombies. They are counting on you to keep your 11 year old out of their game.
3. GET GAME SMART
No matter what platform you use (Xbox, Wii, Playstation) Microsoft has developed a great website for parents and kids to use to learn how to be responsible gamers. GetGameSmart.com has great content for every member of the family but one of the things we love the most here at Wired Moms are the tools on the site for families to talk about the Family Rules for playing games. They provide the tools to initiate the conversation on setting limits, implementing the family settings on new games, and making a plan for balancing video play with school work and real life.
PRO TIP: Spend 15 minutes talking with your kids and establishing the guidelines for what is ok in your own house before beginning to play. It will save you hours of antaganism down the road.
4. PLAY WITH YOUR KID
Your job is not done when you pay for the game at the store. You don’t have to spend the same amount of time playing the games as the kids do but you do need to know what they are playing. In a recent study by Carnagie Mellon University kids will play approximately 10,000 hours of video games by the time they are 21. To put that in perspective, if your child had perfect attendance at school from 5th grade to graduation day from High School they will have spent 10,080 hours studying. So, it appears that our kids are playing games as much as they are spending on their studies. We really should have an interest in what they are playing.
PRO TIP: Get a couple of games that you enjoy playing too. If you have a good balance of games that everyone in the house likes to play then you will be more likely to spend time playing together.
5. KNOW THE TERMS OF SERVICE
There are more and more games available online. Many of them are free to play. Several of them have Terms of Service. Some games are designed for younger kids like BuildaBearVille.com but many these days are being designed for grownups. So, just because it is a game and it’s online does not necessarily mean that it is ok for kids. So, check what games your kids are playing online.
The second thing to be careful about online is the newer phenomenon of buying virtual goods with actual money. According to some calculations people are spending over $1.5 billion on virtual goods a year. So, you may want to watch your wallet when your kid is playing a game online (or you too). This billion dollar industry is being built one $1 avatar add on at a time. People who spend money on virtual goods are spending an average of $75 per year. But this industry is growing. Growing fast.
PRO TIP: Terms of Service is the best way to avoid confrontation with your kid. If they are not 13 and they want their own MySpace page you can just show them the TOS and let them know you are not the bad guy.
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Finally – CONNECT with WIRED MOMs
We love games and playing games and have expert mom gamers who have been gaming since the first game of PONG was sold for private home use. We have gamed through the advent of the Joy Stick for the PC and the game cube, and the evolving Xbox’s and PSP’s and now of course we adore Wii especially Wii bowling and Rock Band.
We have a great team of kid reviewers who give us their honest opinion whether the ESRBs got it right or not.
You are not alone. Our team is out there to help guide you through the mire of new games and provide you with possible suggestions. You can send us your questions or follow us on Twitter ( @wiredmoms where we review games or @wiredmom where we keep you up to date on all of the news that interests us the most ).
If you find a game you think we should know about or have a concern about one of our reviews then we would love to hear from you.
Happy Bastille Day
Dis-moi qui tu fréquentes, et je vous dirai qui vous êtes.
(Tell me whom you frequent, and I will tell you who you are.)
- French proverb
Start out slow and work through new sites together
There were two very lucky things that happened to me as a parent. I was “online” early on in the early days of the Internet before my kids. And so we explored the Internet together as new sites emerged (like myspace, myyearbook, youtube, and facebook). The second fortunate thing that happened was that I found Parry Aftab’s book “Parents Guide to the Internet”. I read this book cover to cover – and this was during a time when my kids were very little and in the evening when I would sit down on the couch, after putting the kids to sleep, and had a chance to read a little I would fall asleep just trying to greeting cards.
So, as my kids learned about the Internet I was learning too – we all learned together. But those early days are past and kids today seem to be hardwired to all things Internet from birth. And many parents try to do their best to supervise by putting a computer in a central area but then they often leave the kids to roam where they will whenever they want to. More and more I have seen young elementary school age kids with iPhones and other net accessible toys. We give our kids laptops with webcams so they can do their homework. And even schools are getting into the action by handing out laptops to “keep our kids competitive”.
The world of technology is moving faster and faster. It is time for us to take a step back (just for a moment) and take back the task of parenting and be our childrens guides through this techy world. It boils down to being able to make good decisions and this can be a challenge for a very young kid. It is a fine balance between letting them be kids and allowing them to feel like a big kid and venture out into the world of social networking online.
Here are some of our recommendations:
- Be firm about the Terms of Service. Let your kid know it is not your rule but it is the rules that are on the site. So, for example, the Terms of Service on many social sites like facebook say that a person must be 13 to join. When they turn 13 you can sit down together and work through the security settings together so that you both know. Even if you have done this already with one of your kids it is a good exercise to go through again with your next kid because so many sites change their TOS and security settings every now and then.
- Let your kid know you have their back and will be watching out for them (not hovering watching over them) in case someone else posts an unwanted picture of them etc. Then if they are active on a site my recommendation is to be active on that site as well. Have fun WITH them so that they feel more comfortable about coming to you when they have questions or concerns.
- When at all possible sit together and and update your social sites at the same time. If you are sharing one computer then sit together. If you both have laptops then sit in the same room and update your sites together. This can lead to lots of laughs besides giving your kid a chance to keep you in the loop and giving you the chance to help guide them through good and bad decision making by other people online posting questionable status updates.
- Ask your kid what they think about a certain status update you both have seen and talk about if it was a good idea or a bad idea to talk about something personal on such a public format.
- And then after they are feeling more comfortable with this whole line of conversation ask them about other things they may have seen on the internet or what sites their friends are telling them they should check out.
Start out slow, work through it together, build trust and be a parent.
Thank you from Wired Moms
Thank you for completing the Wired Moms Summit Registration. Space is very limited and we may not be able to accomodate everyone that registers. We will be sending registration verifications via email.
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Wired Moms
Keeping our kids safe online
